relationship and marriage

I know that some will think the above heading suggests why it’s not necessary to get married but it’s beyond that. Just follow me.

Marriage is an institution created by God. This same God is business minded and physically, a business man always thinks of profit. Whatever God creates, there’s a purpose for it. The both spouses in marriage have a purpose to fulfil. Below are 3 reasons why you should not marry.

1. Don’t marry because of loneliness. Many people are confused by the words “alone” and “lonliness.” To be alone means that there’s no one with you or that you’re without help. Genesis 2:18 says that “it is not good for man to live alone” ( good news version), “it is not good for man to be alone” (NIV) so God made for him a suitable help meet. To be lonely means that you’re unhappy. Marriage is between two complete people. Physically, half plus half becomes one but according to God, “two shall become one.” Don’t go into marriage because you’re lonely. First of all, be happy and satisfied as a single; remember that it is only Jesus that can satisfy you not your spouse. Build a relationship with God, discover your purpose and begin to live out your purpose. Remember that Adam was working, tending the garden before God made Everything. In the process of doing God’s work, he’ll reward you and part of that reward is a godly spouse. Sirach 26:3 says that “a good wife is among the precious blessings given to those who fear the Lord.

2. Don’t marry because of physical appearance. This is one of the mistakes that most young people make. They marry a man or woman because of their looks. I’m not saying that appearance doesn’t matter but it should not be the number one on the list. Proverbs 31:30 says “charm is deceitful, beauty is vain but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.” Physical appearance will never keep a marriage. The way that a man or woman was at 10 will not be the same way he or she will be at 70; remember that marriage is for life. Another scripture that proves that physical appearance should not be the number one thing to look out for was the time God told Samuel to anoint David as king. We see it in 1samuel 16. Samuel at first did not know who God wanted him to anoint. So he saw some of Jesse’s sons who were tall, handsome and said hmm, one of them must be the one but God said no. He doesn’t judge as we judge, many look at the outward appearance but just like God, we ought to look beyond. Outward appearance should not be the first thing you look out for in a man or woman. They can have good outward appearance but are agents of darkness or lack character.

3. Don’t marry because of wealth. Looks difficult right? Now, finance is a very important aspect of marriage and that is a different thing; topic for another day. Some people marry because the man or the woman have money not because they truly love them or saw character. They marry solely because of money. If you’re married to a wealthy spouse, thank God for you. But those of you who are in a relationship with someone who isn’t wealthy yet, it isn’t a call for alarm. Life is a process and with God, hard work, diligence, you’ll get there. Please stop putting unnecessary pressure on your partner to make money quick. Remember that if you rush things, you might just ruin them. Support your partner, encourage them, pray for and with them. Sirach 26:3-4 says “a good wife is among the precious blessings given to those who fear the Lord. Whether such men are RICH or POOR, they’ll be happy and always look cheerful.” Remember that it is God that gives power to make wealth.

You should marry because you are ready for it and because you know deeply that you both have a purpose to fulfil. The scripture says that “one will chase a thousand and two shall put ten thousand to flight.” Marry for the right reasons; this itself is a topic for another day. May God help us to fulfil our marital destiny in Jesus name, amen. God bless you

Your relationship and marriage coach,

Chiamaka Opara