relationship and marriage

I met a lady one time when I went for an official work at Abuja. She happened to work in a firm close to where I worked. I liked her because she was jovial and open minded. One faithful day, we went out to have dinner and we discussed random topics. I then seized the opportunity to ask her, her thoughts on relationships and premarital sex. She first of all giggled and told me that she had been in several relationships and sees nothing wrong in having sex before marriage. According to her, having sex with the guy shows how much the both of you love each other and it also brings you both closer. I was silent for a while because my brain was still processing all she had said.

Hear this ladies, sex is not a proof that the guy you’re in a relationship with loves you. There are many real life stories of how guys slept with a lady they thought they loved but dumped them afterwards. You can never use sex to make him love you, make him stay with you or even make him marry you. Having sex prior to marriage does not even ensure sexual compatibility like some people say. It’s like going to a shop to get a can of pringles but telling the shop owner that you want to have a taste before paying for it. The plain and bitter truth is that premarital sex is wrong. Sex in itself is not bad but was originally made to be enjoyed within the confines of marriage. The Bible says therefore shall a man leave his father and mother and be united to his wife and they shall become one flesh. Engaging in premarital sex means that with each person you sleep with, you become one flesh with them. 1corinthians 6:16 says “the man who joins his body to a prostitute becomes physically one with her”. This was never the creator’s idea. Sex is to be engaged in inside marriage. Hebrews 13:4 says “marriage should be honoured by all and the marriage bed kept pure”. 1corinthians 6:18 says “avoid immorality. Any other sin that a man commits does not affect his body but the man who’s guilty of sexual immorality sins against his own body”. Your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit and he lives in you. Keep your body holy, let your mind be pure because out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks. And if you’ve engaged in it before or you’re still engaging in it, please abandon those ways and turn to the Lord for forgiveness. His hands are wide open to receive you back.

May God help us to live in purity. God bless you.

Your relationship and marriage coach,

Chiamaka Opara